


let me hear you, angel

by SunshineandLou



Category: One Direction (Band)
Genre: Bottom!Harry, Daddy Kink, Feminization, Harry is a camboy, M/M, Nick just sucks lol, Overstimulation, Sex Toys, Spanking, it's mainly smut, louis is a psychologist, sub!Harry
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-03-06
Updated: 2020-03-06
Packaged: 2021-02-27 19:33:27
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 11,259
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22951039
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SunshineandLou/pseuds/SunshineandLou
Summary: Louis has problem. That problem is called ‘hazzabanana:)<3’, and Louis loves everything about it.Or, Harry is a camboy Louis gets obsessed with and, years later, life finds a strange way to make his wildest dreams come true.
Relationships: Harry Styles/Louis Tomlinson, Harry Styles/Nick Grimshaw
Comments: 18
Kudos: 285





	let me hear you, angel

Louis finds it by mistake.

He’s not usually that picky, but tonight he can’t seem to find anything he likes enough to watch for more than 4 seconds. He’s been browsing for half an hour now and he’s getting a bit frustrated. It’s just porn for God’s sake, it shouldn’t be this complicated. 

It doesn’t take much longer for him to give up and decide to just settle for his old but trusted favourites. Only instead of going on his profile he mis-clicks on the live shows page and now he’s faced with user ‘hazzabanana:)<3’. Well, it’s more like he’s faced with the sight of white lace panties covering what seems to be a very angry, very lovely dick. The person is kneeling on lilac bed sheets with their legs spread wide opened, revealing milky thighs that look like they were meant to be bitten and white stockings that are partially covering a tattoo Louis can’t identify. They’ve got a pair of ferns inked on their hips as well, decorating the softest looking love handles Louis has ever seen. There’s the red ‘live’ button flashing beside the name and said profile picture, and Louis has never clicked on anything so fast in his life.

The first thing that Louis thinks when he enters the stream is that whoever the fuck hazza banana is, they might be living proof that angels exist. 

The view is less zoomed out, showing the person sitting on their heels on the same bed. Their face still isn’t visible, but the shot now includes muscular shoulders and big, awkward hands in candy orange nail polish. They’re wearing a pastel pink fuzzy sweater that would almost fade into the pale of their skin if it wasn’t for the bits of ink scattered seemingly everywhere and for the hint of long chocolate locks. They’re wearing an equally pink skirt, the flowery lace flowing lightly over their thighs and revealing what seems to be a tiger tattoo. 

"Wore it all day." A voice says and fuck, it wasn’t what Louis was expecting. It’s low and deep, a touch raspy but smooth like honey. "Been a good boy. Didn’t even touch my cock once."

And wow, okay. Good boy, he says. Louis is definitely hard now.

Said boy is fiddling with the hem of his skirt like he’s anxiously waiting for something, and how much does it take to fall in love?

He makes a show of turning around then, exposing thick white socks scrunched up on dainty ankles, and as if that wasn’t endearing enough, they’ve got a little loose strand of lace at the top. He’s on all fours now, smooth thighs on display, arse up in the air. He wiggles a little before one of his hands are sneaking around, dragging his fingers everywhere but where he clearly wants it most. When they finally reach the skirt to slide it higher, it’s to reveal the cutest little bum that’s adoring a plug with a clear, sparkly pink gem. He’s moving his hips more purposely now, slower but wider, feeling the way the metal is moving inside him. It’s nothing but playful and Louis is desperately salivating.

The boy lasts a good minute before his bony fingers reach the plug tentatively. He’s not even moving it yet and Louis can spot the way the muscles in his thighs contract in anticipation. When he starts pulling the plug out, it’s so fucking slow that Louis can’t help but groan. It’s far quicker when he pushes it back in, but then there’s a long sigh that fills the air and Louis is not even ashamed of the precome that bubbles out of his dick at the sound. It’s absolutely beautiful, is what it is, and Louis is so ready to hear more of that.

The action is repeated a few times as the boy plays around with his plug, twisting it and testing his walls in calculated moves. When he removes it out of himself completely, there’s a trail of lube that’s oozing out of his pink, stretched out rim. That’s just as beautiful, really.

The boy arches down to the right and that reveals the full view of his long, curly hair. It’s draping his accentuated shoulder blades in such a delicate way and the contrast is nothing short of breathtaking. 

When he gets back up, he sits back on his hunches with a glittery lavender dildo in hand. It’s already lubed up and he doesn’t waste a second before running the tip between his arse cheeks. Louis can hear him breathe clearer now, shaky intakes of breaths that are getting closer and closer to being full on whines. 

"Wish someone was here to take care of me." The boy says quietly, and it sounds sadder than it should. His thighs are already trembling from grinding back slowly on the dildo. Louis would really like to mark them a little. 

It’s when he raises himself up slightly and angles the toy so it finally catches on his rim that Louis breaks. He wraps a hand around himself just in time to witness the way the boy slowly starts to sink down as he gives himself the first few tugs. It grows silent for a minute, no traces of the heavy breathing from earlier. Louis holds his breath.

"Oh." The boy faintly slips out once he bottoms out. "Oh, _yes_."

Alright, Louis needs to reassess here, because he’s already embarrassingly close and nope, that can’t be happening. He’s going to make it through the end of that live show, he’s got no other choice. He pinches his tip hard before stopping the motion of his hand in determination. He can do this, he’s not 14 years old. 

The boy is wiggling in tiny jerks of his hips, slow circles that he seems too eager to finish. He spreads his legs even wider because yes, of course he has to be exceptionally flexible, of course just looking and sounding the way he does isn’t enough. 

Then he raises himself up until the plastic cock is almost out. It’s so slow, so steady, and so when he slams his whole body down back on it and moans brokenly, Louis’ heart fully skips a beat. 

He starts riding the toy almost lazily. Only Louis call tell it’s far from lazy from the way his whole body is shaking. He’s teasing himself, forcing a rhythm upon himself that is clearly not enough, but he keeps going. Louis goes back to stroking himself, trying to follow the slow movements he’s seeing on his screen. He’s not as successful, but he’s still far from the frantic pulls he desperately wants to give himself, so he considers it a win.

"Yeah, yeah." The boy picks up in a high pitch yet soft voice. "Feel so full, fuck, love it so much."

It’s probably the most typical porno thing he could’ve said, and that kind of talk is usually what makes Louis click out of a video, but this, _this_ is something else. There’s something about the way it rolls over his tongue, something about the way he says it that sounds overly honest, vulnerable, even. It’s the kind of talk that Louis usually despises, and yet right now he’s dying to hear more of it.

Yeah, that boy is something else. 

He’s picking up the pace now, Louis following suit, and just when it seems like this whole thing is reaching its apotheosis, the boy turns his head back around. 

Louis’ hand stills on his cock again, because there’s just no way that’s possible. There’s no way there’s someone in this world that’s alive and breathing looking like this.

Green. The first thing that strikes him is the green of his eyes. They’re darkened by lust but still somehow so vibrant Louis feels dizzy with it. He’s looking at the camera with a wide, glassy stare that goes straight to Louis’ cock. 

The rest of his face is just as devastating. He’s the most contradicting thing Louis has even seen and he instantly wants to study everything about him. He’s a mixture of delicate and sharp, a life-altering assortment of softness and edges. He’s got a well-defined jaw leading up to pudgy, pink stained cheeks. His eyebrows are furrowed in concentration and it should look intimidating, but it looks like a pout more than anything else. And his mouth, bloody hell. His lips are so plump and red they almost look cartoonish. They’re parted obscenely, just enough to let cute little bunny teeth peeking out. 

He looks fucking filthy and yet so cherubic, Louis is positively ruined. Completely, utterly ruined.

"Right there, fuck, so good." The boy cries out, his voice breaking with it in the loveliest way. 

His eyes are rolling back and his fingers are mindlessly playing with his swollen bottom lip. He’s fucking himself thoroughly now, hips rolling fast on his purple dildo. Louis doesn't know when he started stroking himself again but he's going at it with full force. The heat is growing at a dangerous rate in the pit of his stomach and he knows he won't be able to stop anymore. 

"Close." Is what the boy manages to get out helplessly. He throws his head back as his hair hits the sweaty curve of his back. It's so sexy, Louis just needs a few more seconds and- "Daddy, daddy, gonna come now."

Louis comes all over himself at that, milky white ropes spurting out for what feels like forever. His vision clears out to the sight of the boy on his screen moving in frantic, desperate jerks and his right hand pulling himself in time. He's moaning loudly now, eyes squeezed shut, and then he's coming with a stream of _daddy_ that makes Louis' cock twitch in sympathy. 

Louis should click out now. The boy’s just sitting there with his eyes closed, there’s nothing happening and Louis should click out, but he can’t bring himself to.

A minute passes by before the boy opens his eyes again. He just stares at the camera distantly. Nothing’s happening still, _click out_.

But Louis is mesmerized. Mesmerized by the furious blush of his cheeks, by his emeralds slowly clearing out, by how he’s gently nibbling his nearly crimson lips. And it’s bordering on too much, the way he’s staring with his big doe eyes, because while he looks completely out of it still, there’s something so intensely personal about it that Louis feels slightly uneasy. It’s fucking stupid, because Louis is looking at a screen and this hazza banana guy’s just glaring at a camera lens. He’s well aware, thank you.

He’s still not closing the tab, though. 

He doesn’t close it, even once the boy lets a final smile curve on his lips. He doesn’t close it, even as he waddles clumsily to the camera. Louis even takes a few seconds to stare at the screen once it turns black, because apparently user ‘hazzabanana:)<3’ has the power to rander poor innocent men completely stupid. 

Louis feels like he’s just had some sort of spiritual experience and, as satisfying as it all was, it’s a little unsettling considering the fact that all he did was watch some porn and have a casual wank. Maybe he should stick to his normal videos, then.

-

So maybe Louis has a problem.

He doesn’t mean for it to become a habit. It’s just that sparkly green eyes and lace over ink is the first thing that appears on his page when he logs in two days later. And, well, Louis is only human, so of course he clicks on it. You absolutely can not blame it on him.

It’s the video of last week’s live show, and the experience is just as profound. If Louis manages to watch all the past live shows by the time the boy is doing a new one, nobody has to know. In his defense, it’s a relatively new account. It is still a lot of porn he’s just watched in a few days though, he knows.

Which is why Louis thinks this might be close to becoming a problem. Because he’s got to wait a full week for new content then and it’s harder than it should be. He does try to watch other stuff, but everything else feels boring and dull in comparison. 

Louis has always judged people who were oddly picky and selective about porn. He’s always been a firm believer of the ‘porn is porn’ mindset, so he feels a little pathetic. He’s turning into an obsessive old man whose dick can only be brought to life by something specific AND is regressing back to an hormonal teenager who spends their friday night wanking furiously in their room. Again, Louis feels pathetic.

It’s not like that’s going to stop him though. His pathetic ass still makes sure he has a clear schedule every Monday at 10. 

In the past few weeks, Louis has learned a few things about the guy, who goes as ‘H’. He’s mentioned having classes one time, but that’s the only personal detail he’s ever shared. Mostly, it seems that Louis’ intuitions were right when he first saw the boy. He indeed is an angel. Well, an angel who’s pretty kinky and who’s definitely a cockslut, but an angel nonetheless. Louis still feels slightly disoriented when the boy smiles because as it turns out, H’s full smiles light up his entire face and come with a set of abysmal looking dimples that Louis wants to drown in.

So when this week’s live show starts with a close shot of H’s face giving a shy but radiant smile, Louis’ heart aches a little. His lips are colored a bright fuschia, topped off with some kind of gloss that makes them extremely shiny and a touch glittery. Louis’ not sure, but there might be a little bit of mascara involved, too. It’s all sorts of lovely and pretty, really.

"Hiiii." He greets timidly. He looks at the camera and frowns. "Oh, that isn’t right."

He stands up and plays with the shot a little, making it wider but still more focused than usual. He trips on something on his way back to his bed, muttering a low ‘ _shit, god dammit!_ ’ and Louis is hopelessly endeared. 

Now that he’s sat down on the edge of the bed, Louis gets to see right to his collarbones. He’s wearing a thin, acrylic baby blue choker with a metallic heart shaped hole in the middle. His hair is a mess; they seem to be tied-down somehow but there’s loose strands coming out from everywhere. It’s cuter than it should be.

"So, I received this new toy today?" He says. It sounds hesitant, careful almost, but he’s still wearing a smile as he looks down to what Louis guesses is the toy he’s talking about. "It’s so cute and I can’t wait to use it."

He brings his hand up to his mouth, dainty fingers playing with his tainted bottom lip naively. His nails are painted a matching fuschia color. He looks up at the camera then, eyes bright and playful. Ghost of a smile still present, he lets his pointer finger slip into his mouth slowly, not even blinking once. He starts sucking on it and closes his eyes.

"Thought about this all day." The boy sighs. He removes his finger only to bring up a glass dildo to rest on his lips. It’s quite small but curved perfectly and is made up of 3 beads. At the bottom of it, a pink bow marks the glass turning into a clear, pink loop holding a tiny bullet vibrator. 

H gives the toy a few kitten licks to start off, before slipping it in his mouth almost all the way in. He hollows his cheeks obscenely around it, twists it around a bit like he wants to taste every inch of it. 

It doesn’t take long before he starts moving it in and out of his mouth. He’s got his eyes closed in an expression close to delight and he’s humming around the glass. He keeps pushing it in as far as it can go every time like he’s fully wishing to gag on it. The sight of the clear glass going past the boy’s luscious, yummy lips forces Louis to get his pants off. He usually waits a bit, tries to enjoy the show for a while before getting on with it to make sure he lasts, but he’s so hard and wet his briefs are getting unbearingly uncomfortable. 

When H decides to get the toy out, there’s a string of saliva that follows it and dribbles down his chin. He looks wrecked like this, with his rosy cheeks and glassy eyes and indecent mouth. It’s truly unfair to Louis’ existence.

He sneaks a hand back to reach the lube, revealing a very, very messy braid tied up with a white scrunchy. He sits back farther apart to give a view of his full body in nothing but high waisted panties. They’re a sheer, light blue material and they’re covered in delicate little flowers and the smallest white pearls. Louis barely gets to admire them though, because the boy slips them down easily right when he’s done lubing up his fingers.

He slips his right hand behind himself and, from the face he pulls a few seconds later, it’s clear he’s started fingering himself. The way his shoulder is flexing as he does it is nothing short of fascinating. 

Once he deems himself ready, the boy pulls his fingers out and lubes up the toy. Louis has learned pretty quickly that H likes not being thoroughly prepped sometimes, says he likes the stretch and burn of it. He’s definitely got something for pain, which makes a lot of ideas run through Louis’ brain every time he’s reminded of it.

H lays back slightly on his mountains of pillows, knees bent as he opens up his legs. He circles his entrance a little with the rounded tip of his glass dildo, letting out a breathless gasp whenever it catches to his bubblegum rim. 

He pushes it in one bead at a time. His mouth opens up a bit more each time, and by the time the last bead gets in so the head presses against the boy’s prostate, it’s fully gaping. He allows a minute of ragged breathing before he reaches down and starts the vibration.

There’s no words that could describe the beauty that follows. His whole body grows instantly rigid, face contorted in an expression Louis wants to tattoo behind his eyelids. It seems like the boy’s voice is caught in his throat at first, but then he lets out this long, broken sob. 

That's when Louis decides he’s endured enough. He finally, _finally_ wraps a hand around himself and starts stroking himself. He watches as H’s cock starts dripping on his sheets. The boy fists his hands in them, probably to prevent himself from doing the exact same thing Louis has just started doing.

He doesn’t last very long, though. H ends up running his knuckles around his length in an attempt to relieve himself, but it only seems to make things worse. He’s ruting frantically on the mattress and starts belting out a constant stream of high pitched whines. He’s trying to mumble something but doesn’t seem to be able to either find or form the words, which, Louis can definitely relate to that.

"C’mon, baby." Louis mutters at the screen. Remember when he said that this H guy had the power to rander men stupid? Yeah, Louis still isn’t immune to that, and he’s taken to encouraging the boy out loud. Louis’ not _that_ daft—he knows he’s not actually being heard by him, mind you. It’s just that it seems to get out naturally in the heat of the moment and, somehow, it feels weirdly right.

And encouraging him seems highly needed that now, considering the fact that Louis is about to come his brains out. Again, Louis is aware that he could come whenever he wants because H has no clue about his existence nor does he know about his currently struggling stamina, but Louis still feels like he owes it to him to wait for him. So he’s pretty thankful when the boy wraps his hand around his very dark cock and starts to fully pull himself. Louis’ just waiting for the words to come out of his mouth, which should happen anytime now.

"Oh, daddy." Yeah, there we go. "I- Oh god, please, _daddy_."

Louis curses under his breath, about to hit the point of no return. This boy is going to be the death of him. There’s no other way to put it. 

"Fuck, yeah, good to go."

The second the words leave the boy’s mouth, he’s spilling all over himself and moaning one last time. Louis does the same shortly after, the force of it knocking the air out of his lungs. He closes his eyes for a second as his heartbeat calms down.

They pop back open the second he hears it. A giggle. An honest to God, literal giggle. 

"Made a mess, didn’t I?" The boy laughs out. And then he dips his finger through the layer of come covering his stomach and fucking licks it. 

If there’s a way for Louis to recover from this, he would very much like to be informed. He’s not sure how he’s supposed to just move on from this and continue on with his life, honestly. He’s going to try his hardest, but if he’s having trouble being a functional human being from now on, it’s absolutely not his fault. 

Louis has problem. That problem is called ‘hazzabanana:)<3’, and Louis loves everything about it. 

-

It happens 3 years later.

Louis’ getting ready for his last appointment of the day. He takes time to reads through his notes even though the things coming out of that dickhead’s mouth are quite hard to forget.

Listen, Louis usually doesn’t call his clients dickheads. He became a psychologist especially because he believes there’s good in everyone and that it’s never too late to make a change. He’s compassionate, he’s able to create a good work relationship with pretty much all of his clients and he always manages to believe in them. 

However, there’s just something about this guy that rubs him the wrong way. Louis’ had worst clients; people who do terrible things and don’t even think they’re wrong, people who are forced to come see him and have absolutely no motivation to work on themselves, he’s even had that woman who kept insulting him whenever he literally just as much as breathed. 

Nick takes the cake somehow. He’s full of himself, he’s judgmental and clearly narcissistic. He’s just overall annoying, really, and Louis would give anything to be able to go home right now rather than have to deal with him for an hour.

Okay, maybe there’s also a little bit of a personal issue. See, Nick has been convinced by his boyfriend to come to therapy because of his supposedly quick temper and degrading attitude. Nick doesn’t believe in that, of course, says it’s not his fault that his boyfriend does everything to get on his nerves. It all went downhill for Louis when he learned what he really meant by the degrading attitude part. Apparently, his boyfriend is into some pretty ‘wild’ sexual stuff, and Nick thinks it’s absolutely outrageous.

It hits Louis too close to home every time. He knows what it feels like to be the guy with so-called unhealthy fetishes, knows how it feels like to have someone you care about judge you for liking the things you do. Louis tries his best not to let it show, not to lose his temper. He thinks he’s doing a pretty good job of it, but to be quite honest, it takes off a lot of his energy. Maybe Louis should buy himself a punching bag and some boxing gloves to get out his frustration after clients like these.

But anyway, Nick’s been coming for 3 weeks and actually participates a little, which is already a start. His boyfriend is supposed to come along today, so things are definitely about to get interesting.

Louis gets up and goes to the waiting room. Nick’s waiting by the door, pacing rapidly. He looks mad, and as much as Louis isn’t surprised, he still lets out a discouraged sigh. 

"Hi, are we ready to start?" Louis asks.

"Harry decided right now was the best time for him to go to the bathroom, so no, we’re not."

Louis gives a polite nod, because what else could he possibly say to that? After a minute of uncomfortable silence, Nick throws his hands in the air.

"You know what, let’s start without him. He can just come in when he’s done."

"As you wish." Louis says. Under other circumstances Louis would’ve waited for the guy, but he’ll do anything to get out of that awkward situation and be done with this shitshow as soon as possible.

They get to Louis’ office and let the door opened for Nick’s boyfriend to come in when he’s ready. Nick isn’t even fully seated yet when he starts complaining.

"He always does this. If it’s not the bathroom he’s forgotten something in the car, or he wants to change his outfit for the third time, or he wants us to take some fucking calming breaths because of a meaningless comment I made."

"It seems like it bothers you a lot." Louis points out.

"Of course it does! He makes everything complicated and I just—Well there you are."

It may have been 3 years, but Louis recognizes him the second he snaps his head to the door and sees him. The green eyes, the lanky figure, the tattoos and the curls. Louis wants to disappear into the ends of the earth immediately.

"Sorry." Harry says. Yep, same deep, raspy voice. Shorter hair, but still. It all checks out.

This isn’t going to go well.

Harry comes to sit down next to his boyfriend, and Louis really wants to die. He knows there’s only one right thing to do in situations like this, knows he’ll have to say something, but right now he can’t muster the courage. Thankfully, Nick decides he isn’t done with his little temper tantrum.

"What took you so long?" He half whispers, half screams. 

"My mom called, I’m sorry. I didn’t know you guys were waiting for me."

"What do you mean you didn’t know? You decided to go take a piss literally 2 minutes before the start of the appointment, Harry. Don’t play dumb."

"I’m not playing dumb! Fuck, Nick, can we please not do this right now? I’m here now, aren’t I?" 

The only answer Nick gives him is a glare that Louis would not like to be on the receiver end of. This is really, really great. 

Harry turns to Louis then.

"We’re ready to start." Harry announces as he gives his best smile. Louis knows how fake it is, though.

He knows because he’s seen Harry’s real smiles. The ones that form freely when he’s about to fuck himself to oblivion. In porn videos. That Louis has seen. An unhealthy amount of times. 

Fuck.

"Actually, I… I’m really sorry, but we’ll have to cut this short." Louis starts hesitantly.

"What?" Nick asks in disbelief.

"I’m sorry we were fighting. God, this is so embarrassing…" Harry breathes out.

"Oh, no, this isn’t about your… Altercation, or whatever that was." Deep breaths, Louis, you’ve got this. Let’s rip it off like a bandaid and forget this ever happened over too many shots of tequila later tonight. "This isn’t anyone’s fault, I just can’t have you guys as clients anymore. We’re not allowed to treat patients we have a connexion with, so I’ll have to refer you guys to one of my colleagues."

"You know him?" Nick asks Harry, clearly confused. 

"No? I mean, I don’t think so?" Harry answers hesitantly. 

"I do know you, actually. This is going to be awkward and I’m sorry, but I’ve seen your videos, Harry. I watched you all the time back in the days and bought you stuff through your account. We had a few brief conversations online, and you may not know who I am, but I know who you are and we’ve interacted before. That would tint my attitude towards the both of you, so it’s my legal obligation to let you know and terminate our professional relationship."

There’s a silence that follows, a silence unlike anything Louis’ ever experienced in his life. When he finally looks up to Harry, the boy’s got his eyes trained on the floor and a face so red he looks like he’s about to explode.

"What the hell is he talking about, Harry? What videos?" Nick asks, and oh boy, this is just getting worse, isn’t it?

"I… I used to, um, be a camboy, back in the days?" Harry says in the smallest voice.

"A camboy!?"

"Nick…"

"Harry, are you kidding me? How could you hide this from me?" Nick yells out.

"Because it concerns no one else but me! It was just for fun, it’s not a big deal."

"It’s not a big deal? Harry, we’ve been dating for 3 years!"

Has Louis said he wants to die yet? Because Louis really wants to die.

"And I stopped the second we got together, so no, this isn’t a big deal! It has nothing to do with you. I wasn’t hiding it, it just never come up, that’s all"’

"Is it still online?" Nick questions after a few seconds of silence.

Harry doesn’t answer. Only reddens, if even possible.

Nick gets up furiously, his chair slamming on the ground as he does. "Answer me, is it still online? Tell me there’s not videos of my boyfriend being a fucking slut on the internet for everyone to see, you pathetic little—"

"Okay, that’s enough." Louis says as neutral as he can manage while he stands up. Harry looks so small, curled up on himself in his seat. Louis is going to order himself that punching bag as soon as they get out of here.

"Listen here, mate. You said you couldn’t be our therapist anymore, so you should really mind your own business." Nick spits out.

"You’re still in my office, so I suggest you try and be polite." Louis snaps back, because there’s really so much he can fucking take and that’s the limit right here.

"Or what? I bet you’re enjoying this, aren’t you? Are you going to go watch his videos after this then, you disgusting pig?"

"I’m going to have to ask for you to leave now." Louis demands as he takes a step forward into Nick’s space. They just stare at each other for a while. Louis thinks he deserves a medal for not punching this guy in the face.

"Fine, we’re leaving. Let’s go, Harry." Nick grits out through his teeth before walking to the door.

But Harry’s still in his seat. 

"What the fuck are you doing? We’re going, c’mon." Nick insists.

Harry’s still not moving. 

Nick walks back furiously to his chair and grabs him by the arm. "I said we’re going." Nick orders.

When Louis turns his head to Harry, it’s to find him already looking. There’s this pleading look in his eyes Louis just can’t ignore. This is the last straw.

"I can’t let you guys leave together, actually. Not with the way you’re acting towards him." Louis says. It’s not even a lie; Nick represents a danger right now and Harry has shown signs of trying to seek for help. Louis has to do this."’And before you start spatting on more of your outraged nonsense, just know that if you do not cooperate, I’ll have to call the cops. Are we clear?"

Another unbearable silence and one last death stare later, Nick clears out the room. Louis decides to sit back then. Harry hasn’t moved an inch.

It’s hard to tell for how long they sit there. The tension eases out eventually, and then everything is just... Calm. Louis would say something, would do some quick crisis counseling with him, but this isn’t what Harry seems to need at the moment. No; this silence, this is what he needs. Just sitting here peacefully, in this place that is totally safe, with someone who expects nothing from him. It shows in his body like an evolution, the good it does to him. His shoulders square up, his arms unlock, his back straightens up, and finally, his head raises to meet Louis’ level. 

And then he smiles.

"Thank you." Is what Harry says. Louis feels the weight of it, the million other words these two simple ones contain. 

"You’re welcome.’’" Is what Louis says, and he hopes it conveys the same.

Harry takes another minute before getting up and turning to the door. He turns back to Louis almost immediately though, eyes on the ground as his fingers start to play with his bottom lip. Louis’ mind go back to memories of soft whimpers and milky thighs and no, that’s all kinds of wrong right now. How do you punish your own brain?

"So, Nick kind of left with the car and I don’t have my wallet." Harry laughs out nervously. "Would it be okay if I stayed here while I wait for someone to pick me up? I’ll call my sister, she lives close enough, it shouldn’t be too long."

Louis looks at the clock. How is it that late already? 

"I need to lock down the clinic actually, I didn’t notice but it’s way past closing time." Harry’s face falls, and before he can blurt out any excuses, Louis stops him. "But there’s a cafe right next door, we can go there and wait for her together."

"It’s fine, thank you. I’ll just wait by the door, the weather’s nice anyway."

"Please, I insist. It’s no bother, I wanted to grab a coffee anyway, and I need to make sure you head out safely. Unless you feel uncomfortable with that, then of course you’re free to go."

"No, no, that’d be alright." Harry rushes. "We can go."

"Perfect. Let me just grab my stuff, yeah?"

Harry nods rapidly. Louis puts his notes in his folder and locks it back into his desk. He’s going to have a lot of paperwork to fill for all of this, but that’s a concern for another time.

He grabs his jacket and his keys. Harry got out of his office, probably to call his sister. Louis waits until he hears the conversation die down before he steps out of his office and locks it.

"Ready to go?" He asks.

"Yes." Harry smiles.

If Louis looks around the building to make sure Nick isn’t around as he locks the building, he hopes it doesn’t show. It’s a short walk to the cafe, and when they get there, it’s almost empty. 

"Do you want to go find us a table? I’ll go get us something to drink. What would you like?"

"Oh, I’m good, thanks." Harry blushes.

"Are you sure? I’m offering, I don’t mind."

"It’s okay, really.’’" He repeats before giving Louis a small smile and heading for one of the tables.

Of course, Louis orders him something anyway. He’s trying to come up with something that’s not too risky but that also says ‘ _I’m sorry your asshole boyfriend just yelled at you, here’s something to make you feel better_ ’. He settles for a hot chocolate and gets his usual Yorkshire tea.

"You didn’t have to." Harry says immediately as Louis sits down in the booth and puts the mug in front of him.

"I know, but I did anyway."

Harry gives a small laugh at that, an actual real one, and that was definitely worth the 4 bucks he just paid for that shit. In what world is a basic hot chocolate worth 4 bucks?

It grows silent again, and it might be because of the change in settings, but it doesn’t feel as right this time. Harry’s just staring at his cup and keeps on letting out these little sighs that break Louis’ heart.

"Do you want to talk about it?" Louis tries.

"You just finished your work day, I don’t want to bother you. I’m okay."

"You’re not bothering me. I wouldn’t asked if it did, I swear. This isn’t psychologist Louis, it’s just normal, boring Louis." He says, and Harry cracks a smile. Louis doesn’t want him to stop smiling, like ever. "Because I’m Louis, in case you didn’t know. We kind of skipped the greetings and went straight into the drama back there. So yeah, I’m Louis. Hi."

Harry chuckles lightly, which is even better.

"Hi."e says back, looking up with a small smile and finally taking a sip of his overly expensive hot chocolate. "I’m Harry."

"Harry. Okay." Louis nods. "So, Harry. Do you want to talk about it?"

"It’s stupid’’ He sighs with a pout.

"I’m going to be honest here—just normal Louis, remember? It is a bit stupid, yeah." Should Louis be counting the number of smiles he pulls out of the boy? He feels like he shouldn't. He does it anyway. "But you’re still allowed to be upset about it."

"You must think I’m downright crazy, oh my god." Harry says before covering his face with his hands. "You’ve seen me masturbating in lingerie on the internet and have a stupid overly dramatic fight with my even more stupid boyfriend. I’m pathetic."

"Hey, don’t say that. I’m a psychologist, do you think this is the first overly dramatic fight I witness? I literally talk to stupid people for a living, Harry."

"I don’t think your clients would like you calling them stupid, Louis."

"Oh, he’s got attitude. I like it." Louis smirks. Harry tries to hide his smile by talking a sip of his drink, but Louis isn’t fooled. "I probably shouldn’t be saying this, but I’m as stupid as my clients so I’ll do it anyway. If it makes you feel any better, I loved your videos. Like, a concerning amount."

There’s a moment where Louis thinks he’s made a mistake. Harry stops moving, face still down in his cup, eyes fixed on the table. But then he slowly looks up to Louis.

"Really?" He finally asks. 

Louis thinks about it for a second. This is highly unprofessional, there’s no other way around it. However, Harry isn’t his client anymore and they aren’t at the clinic, so he doesn’t even have to be professional. He’s still going to be careful, because obviously he’s still treading waters here, but acknowledging the fact that he can speak and act freely with him without fearing for professional consequences definitely lifts a weight off Louis’ shoulders.

"I’m kind of the pathetic one, actually. I used to watch your live shows religiously. The second you started talking about letting your viewers buy you stuff, I spent a good 4 hours browsing to find you the perfect things. It’s probably a good thing for my mental health that you stopped, I was definitely obsessed."

"What did you buy me?" Harry asks. It should be weird how they’re talking about this so casually, but somehow it isn’t. Knowing Nick probably did numbers on Harry’s sexual confidence, Louis thinks boosting his ego and allowing him to talk about the things he likes in such a positive way might be good for him.

"A lingerie set. It was white, with stockings and all that. You wore it once in a live show and you destroyed my brain for a few days there. Then after that I bought you a vibrating plug to go with it, white little rose at the end of it."

"No way, you’re ‘tommo91’!" Harry exclaims excitingly. "I love those, I still have them!"

"How do you even remember my username?" Louis asks in disbelief.

"You were always so sweet and respectful, you were my favourite viewer. Never asked for anything, just bought me stuff you knew I’d like and complimented me. It stuck with me, I guess." Harry explains.

"Felt like a given to me. Being respectful, I mean."

"Not everyone feels that way, clearly."

"And I’m sorry about that. About people not treating you right."

It’s clear they aren’t just talking about porn anymore, which could be a mistake. Does Louis even have the right to comment on something like that? He probably shouldn’t, but he needs Harry to know he deserves better.

Harry looks back down to the table, drops his head and shoulders with it. 

"He’s not going to change, is he?" Harry whispers.

Louis stays silent for a while. Doesn’t know what to say, really. Because this is not his place, and he doesn’t know Harry and Nick well enough, and mainly he doesn’t want to break this practical stranger’s heart on a Tuesday evening in the middle of a cafe.

Harry’s phone starts ringing, making both men jump. He waits a few seconds before picking it up, looking at Louis with a look the latter doesn’t recognize. 

"Hey." He finally answers. "Yeah, that’s the place. I can see your car by the window, Gems, I think I can walk the two meters separating us just fine." Louis takes a long sip of his tea, mostly as a way to avoid Harry’s staring. "I’m coming, I’m coming! Bye."

Harry hangs up. It’s like there’s this moment that’s dragging on forever, and yet when Harry stands up, Louis feels slightly disoriented. 

"I don’t… I don’t really have the words to thank you properly."

"Was just doing my job." Louis replies.

"We both know that’s not true. You didn’t have to do any of this. But you did, and I’ll never forget that. You’re a good person, Louis. Thank you so much."

Louis still doesn’t feel totally anchored. All he manages is a smile and a slight nod.

Harry walks out of the cafe and almost gets hit by a bike as he crosses the road to meet his sister’s car. It should make Louis laugh, but it doesn’t.

He finishes the last sip of his tea and goes home.

-

A few weeks pass, and then Louis is betrayed by a porn website yet again. It’s the first thing that pops up when he logs in, the sight of that curly headed sex kitten. It’s a live stream from—wait, yesterday?

Louis is not going to click. That’d be weird, wouldn’t it? It’s not just ‘hazzabanana:)<3’ or H anymore, it’s Harry, who he’s met. Harry, who is in a relationship with Nick, who gave nearly 4 hours of details about their dysfunctional relationship to Louis. He’s a had coffee with him and they talked about respect, bloody hell, he’s not going to click.

Then Louis realises what Harry’s wearing, and he’s clicking.

"Hi! It’s been a while, hasn’t it?" He says with a full smile (dimples included) as he takes a seat on his bed. "Have you missed me?"

He’s in the white embroidered merrywidow, laced up to his neck that he topped off with a beautiful pearl necklace. He’s got the lace panties as well as the sheer white cuban stockings. He looks like a doll. 

Also, that’s the lingerie set Louis bought him years ago. 

Harry runs his hands gently on his smooth, porcelain thighs. His legs open wide as he goes, and then he starts rubbing himself through his panties.

"I’m so excited to be back." He sighs.

He’s getting harder and harder under the lace. He’s stroking himself lazily, doesn’t pick up the pace even once he’s fully poking out and the material is getting soaked. He just keeps going, barely falters. He’s got his eyes closed and he lets the faintest moans slip out, but he’s clearly in no rush. He looks so serene like this. Free. It appeases something in Louis’ heart.

Harry's left hand trails up his body unhurriedly. He comes to a stop once he finds his nipple. He circles his finger around the lace covered nub and you can practically see the shiver that runs through him. 

His movements get a little more purposeful then. His hand is fully wrapped around his cock and he gains a bit of speed as he starts pinching his nipple between his fingers persistently. It’s beautiful and pure and just so overwhelming to see him like this in the lingerie Louis chose for him. 

Harry comes into his panties with a broken sigh. He’s smiling wide still, muttering something about making a mess. He gets up then, turns around and puts his hands down on the end of the mattress. He’s got his back arched obscenely, his perky bum up high facing the camera, and he starts swaying his hips as he slips his panties down his never-ending legs. 

As Harry starts fingering himself leisurely, Louis tries to rationalize this. He’s wearing the garment they talked about last time, Harry knows that Louis bought it for him and loves it on him. That doesn’t mean anything, though. Right?

Louis’ trying really hard to convince himself, but then Harry pulls something out from under his pillow, and it’s the fucking plug Louis got him. Smooth stainless steel, small white flower on its end. 

Louis is losing his mind. Harry’s fucking himself with it now, moaning in ernest. His thighs are straining right in front of Louis’ eyes with the effort and _Louis is losing his mind_.

Harry’s whole body trembles when he comes for the second time. He mumbles something about a third round for his 3 years of absence, but Louis’ too busy trying to tame the thoughts in his head to fully comprehend.

By the time Harry reaches his final orgasm, plug vibrating inside of him as he jerks off almost violently, Louis is still as confused. He doesn’t dare making conclusions because he knows it’d be too beautiful to be true. It just can’t be what he’s thinking.

Then Harry turns around, looks straight at the camera and smiles.

"Goodnight, Louis."

-

Louis doesn’t remember the last time he was this nervous. It’s kind of dumb actually that he’s in such a state for such a stupid thing. Because this is what this is, plain stupid. So why does it feel monumental?

He’s looking at his screen, waiting for the red ‘live’ button to appear. It’s been a week since the last livestream and 4 days since Louis convinced himself to send Harry something. He got a notification confirming that his package was received and collected at the P.O. box yesterday. Now all he has to do is wait.

The live show starts at 10 pm sharp, as usual. 

Louis’ breath gets knocked out of him, as usual. 

There stands Harry. He’s wearing a strappy black one-piece and fishnets strapped to a leathery garter belt. His lipstick and nails are matching yet again, a deep, bright red.

But what really matters is that he’s wearing the black collar and holding the heart shaped paddle Louis bought him.

"I’ve been bad." He starts. His eyelashes are fluttering in front of his big, doll-like eyes. He’s slowly swaying back and forth like a child, hands clasped behind his back and pigeon-toed feet in full force. "M’sorry I teased you like that last week, didn’t want to be bad. Wanna be a good boy for you, always."

Louis wants to be there so bad. He wants to be there as Harry turns around, wants to be there as he gets on the bed with his paddle in hand. His torso his laying on the covers, legs dangling as his arse stands right on the edge of the mattress. He looks so good like this, so inviting. 

The first hit is tentative. The paddle barely makes a sound as it meets the flesh. Harry starts squirming immediately. 

"1." He says. 

He gets more confident after the first few. He clearly starts to enjoy himself, too. Louis doesn’t know what is more intoxicating, the slapping sound of the leather on his reddening skin or the cut-off cries that each spank gets out of him. He’s pushing himself towards the paddle every time, grinds greedily on the bed as he counts aloud. He’s getting so worked up, Louis doesn’t know if the boy will make it through whatever the amount of spanks he’s planning to give himself.

Once his shaky voice breathes a broken ‘ _20_ ’, he lets the paddle fall to the ground. Louis knows he’s coming from the way his hips are stuttering beautifully. Harry just lays there for a minute then, body completely limp against the lilac covers. His arse cheeks are covered in stunning red marks that Louis desperately wants to pepper in kisses. He can’t believe this boy just did that for him. 

"Do I deserve you now?" Harry asks weakly. Louis’ heart is beating erratically in his chest. "God, I want you so bad… Want you to fuck me, need it, need you. Ca't stop thinking about you."

Harry scrambles for his bottle of lube as fast as he can manage and slips two fingers inside of himself just as quickly. He gasps loudly, barely allows his body time to welcome the intrusion before he’s pumping them and scissoring them. Louis’ never seen him in such a hurry. He looks so desperate like this and Louis just has to palm himself.

It doesn’t take long until Harry considers himself ready. He slicks up what Louis knows is his favourite dildo and pushes it all the way in in one go. There’s a sudden urgency in his movements that Louis doesn’t understand, like something crucial and critical is on the line. It’s almost visceral, the way he starts to fuck himself. It’s too fast too quickly, he’s whimpering helplessly like it’s not enough and too much at the same time. 

Louis’ lost in the staggering of Harry’s need. Louis is fully pulling himself now, because along the way the boy’s want became his want. He feels just as desperate all of a sudden, feels like he needs everything and needs it now. It’s almost paralyzing him, this feeling in his gut that’s just pressing and pressing.

"Daddy." Harry cries out, but really cries. He lets out a literal sob and opens his legs as wide as he can, shifts his hips in wavering yet sharp increments. His knuckles are turning white from how hard he’s gripping at the sheets. "Daddy, daddy, wanna be yours, please let me be yours, take me."

And Louis wants that, wants that so much he kind of feels like crying too. Because he’s just scratching an itch he knows won’t go, he’s licking at wounds too deep to be healed. This is so fucking stupid, so monumental still, it’s way passed pathetic and way more than just a problem.

"Gonna be so good, I promise, gonna be the best boy for you."

Harry picks up the pace even more. It’s clear that he’s close, that he’s just not letting himself go for some reason. Everything’s frantic and yet it’s like there’s something missing, something he’s not allowing himself. Louis wants him to have everything.

And then...

"Lou." Harry mumbles. It's barely audible, actually, but Louis knows he's heard it. Suddenly Harry's hips stop moving and his hand is pushing the toy in as deep as it goes in the most gentle of ways. His whole body calms down in an instant. "Lou." He breathes out again just as softly, and then he’s coming again without even taking another breath.

-

It’s getting close to 8 when Louis starts on his last report of the day. He knows his writing is getting messy, knows the thing isn’t going to be very detail oriented, but Louis’ just a man and also he’s getting really hungry. Everyone’s gone by now, because Louis is the only crazy one who always forces himself to complete all his day’s work of paperwork before he goes home. 

Which is why it’s odd when there’s a knock on his office door. Louis thinks he’s imagined it at first, but then it resonates again in the quiet space. 

It could be Gilbert. He’s left his sweater in Louis’ office by mistake Monday after their appointment, might be back to get it. It could also be Alice who’s forgotten the keys to her house in her office again. When will that woman ever learn?

"Come in." Louis sighs.

The door opens slowly, and no, that is definitely not Alice. It’s not Gilbert either.

No, that’s Harry standing by the doorway. 

His emerald eyes lock into Louis’ immediately. Even from afar Louis can spot the little specks of gold cutting through the disorienting evergreen of his irises and Louis gets lost in it instantly. It takes him a minute to come off of it and get back to the fact that Harry’s just standing there by the doorway of his office without a word like that’s a normal thing to do.

"Harry." Louis breathes out. And that’s not really what Louis wanted to say. It’s not how he wanted it to sound like, either. Damn it. "What are you doing here?"

Harry takes a deep breath and then one hesitant step inside Louis’ office. He hasn’t look away yet, hasn’t spoken either. He’s panting a little and he looks slightly panicked. Well, panicked isn’t the word, but there’s something frantic and crazy in his eyes that Louis has never seen. 

"Are you alright?" Louis tries.

"I’m going to say something stupid." Harry responds. Which doesn’t clear anything up, like at all.

"Okay."

There’s another silence that stretches on. It’s heavy in a way that twists Louis’ inside into something he’s not sure he can untangle. Not while Harry is still looking at him like that, that’s for sure.

"I want you to fuck me." Is what gets out of Harry’s mouth in a rush.

And that’s… Well, it’s definitely miles away from the scenarios Louis’ had time to think about while Harry was gathering up his courage, but it’s certainly more interesting.

"You want me to fuck you." Louis repeats. Louis knows he’s heard it right. It’s not a question, it’s not a fact. He just needs some sort of confirmation, or perhaps he’s just buying himself more time to wrap his head around the words.

"I…" Harry averts his gaze to the ground for a second there. When he looks back up, Louis raises his eyebrows in a way he hopes conveys some sort of challenge. Harry takes it. "I broke up with Nick, I’ve started the videos again, I like wearing lingerie and being bossed around and calling people daddy. And that’s okay. And I want you to fuck me."

He almost starts panting once he lets it all out. It was messy and uncontrolled and unprocessed, but it was also raw and honest and it pleases Louis.

"Good." Louis asserts. 

Harry straightens up at the tone, which is interesting. His eyebrows are pulled together like he’s confused, and it’s cuter than it has any rights to be. He looks good today, too good. He’s wearing white high waisted trousers, a silk blouse in navy blue with white details and a pearl necklace Louis knows he’s seen before. 

Every fiber of Louis’ being wants to wreck him.

"Well, what are you waiting for? Come here." Louis demands. 

Harry practically runs to him. He’s clearly towering over Louis, all toned and built, and having such a wonderful creature wrapped around his finger makes Louis semi hard on the spot. Harry’s already so beautifully responsive and Louis needs him, like, yesterday. He wants to make this good, though.

"Do you have a safeword? Use a color code, maybe?" Louis asks more softly. He doesn’t plan on doing anything too intense, but he wants to make sure Harry feels safe and respected.

"Um, I guess color code is fine?"

"I need you to be sure, Harry."

"Color code, yes, I’m sure. Please, Louis, all green." Harry pleads.

It takes everything in Louis not to smirk. But they’re back in the game now, so Louis goes back to his previous stance and crosses his arms over his chest.

"On your knees, then."

Again, Harry doesn’t waste a second before complying. He looks up at Louis with bright eyes and lips slightly parted and fuck, Louis wants him something awful.

Louis unzips his jeans and pulls them down with his pants, just enough for his cock to spring free. Harry’s eyes get comically wide at the sight, he’s licking his lips in anticipation, but he’s waiting for Louis to give him the go. Louis hopes the way he grabs his jaw and yanks him forward until his dick is poking his cheek gets the message across.

Harry doesn’t even allow himself a breath before he opens his mouth and downs more than half of Louis in one go. It’s warm, so warm. That’s when it dawns on Louis that he doesn’t have a lot of chance at surviving this.

Harry hollows his cheeks. He wraps his hand tightly at the base and starts to bop his head slowly. The way his lips look around Louis’ dick as he takes him in and out is almost too much. Louis is not going to miss a second of it, though.

Harry swirls his tongue around the tip before pushing it flat under his shaft. Louis’ trying really hard not to show how affected he already is, which gets harder once Harry decides to remove his hand and take Louis down until he hits the back of his throat. It’s not even on purpose that Louis pushes his hips forward in the wet heat of his mouth, Louis wouldn’t have even noticed if it wasn’t for Harry’s reaction. The boy’s eyes flutter close and he stops moving, just put his hands behind his back and waits.

That’s not the kind of invitation you refuse, so Louis grabs a fistful of his hair and starts to fuck his mouth. He’s careful at first, analyses Harry’s reaction for any sign of discomfort, but he doesn’t find any. He picks up the pace, watches as Harry’s eyes start to water and his cheeks redden. Quiet moans vibrate against Louis’ cock. 

It takes everything in Louis to pull himself out of his enveloping lips, but he knows this has to stop if he wants to make it. Harry looks even more devastated. Louis needs to change that.

"Go stand by the desk."

Harry scrambles to his feet and crosses the few feet that separates him from Louis’ desk. He’s about to turn around, but Louis doesn’t let him. He pushes the boy so he falls down towards the desk. Harry put his hands on the surface just in time, making a pile of reports fly on the floor. He’s got his back to Louis, bent over the desk with his arse already pushing backwards. And really, there’s too much clothing involved for Louis’ taste right now. 

He unbuttons the boy’s trousers and drags it down until it pools at his ankles. Louis had hopes about getting panties to admire, but Harry’s not actually wearing anything underneath. 

"Someone’s a bit naughty, aren’t they?"

Harry keens at the comment, only pushes harder against Louis. Louis doesn’t give him the friction he’s running after, backs off a little to watch the way Harry’s hips sway greedily. Damn that arse, so cute and inviting. Louis’ salivating.

He grabs a handful of each arse cheek, palms them freely before parting the boy. His hole right there, begging for attention, and Louis can’t resist. So he gets on his knees and spreads him even further.

"I’m going to eat you out now." Louis informs him. "What’s your color, baby?"

"Green, green, so green."

Louis can’t contain the smile that breaks on his face. God, Harry is so, so lovely. "Good boy."

Harry’s whole body goes lax the second Louis gets his tongue on him. One stripe over his hole and goosebumps erupt all over his skin. Louis circles him painfully slow, breathes over his rim, gets him properly wet. He hears the gasp that falls off Harry’s lips when he dips the tip of his tongue in, feels the way his thighs start to tremble underneath his fingertips. The boy’s pushing back again to get more, but Louis digs his nails deep to warn him and gets a better grip on him to prevent him from moving. 

Louis doesn’t wait for Harry to react to that, just pushes his tongue inside as deep as it can go. The loud, broken sound that gets out of Harry is more than enough encouragements. Louis continues his ministrations then, revels in the way he can hear Harry’s breath getting caught in his throat every time he dives in. 

He pushes along the first finger not long after. Harry takes it easily. Louis can tell the boy’s getting pant up by how his breathing is getting more and more ragged. He’s quieter than expected though, if Louis is being honest.

He gets another finger alongside the rest, which finally earns him a high-pitched moan. It goes straight to Louis’ neglected, aching cock, the way it resonates loudly in the quiet of his office. He scissors his fingers expertly, enjoys the feeling of Harry’s walls giving up resistance under his care. The boy’s so wet his precome is dripping on the carpet. 

"Do you have anything on you?" Louis asks once he pulls out.

"Trousers." Harry responds simply with a gravelly voice. 

In his pocket, Louis finds a condom and a few packets of lube. He rolls the condom on before slicking himself and Harry up. His head is pulsing with the crazy hammering of his heart as he puts a hand on the small of Harry’s back and guides his hips forward. 

He pushes in slowly. He manages to keep his eyes open long enough to catch the way Harry’s head drops between his shoulders. Once he bottoms out, Louis stills and takes a deep breath. 

"Are you okay?"

Harry nods frantically. "Yes, fuck, please. Move."

Louis doesn't need to be told twice.

He starts easy, small rolls of his hips in a languid rhythm. It’s barely anything and yet he can feel it down to his fingertips. It’s close to maddening, the way Harry’s enclosing him. Louis wants to stay buried inside of him forever.

He starts to fully give it to him then. He snaps his hips faster, harder, pulls out almost completely before slamming back into him. Harry’s holding on the the edge of the desk for dear life with one hand, knuckles white and arm straining. 

That’s when Louis realises where his other hand is. Clasped shut against his mouth. 

That just won’t go.

"Baby, hey." Louis slows down a bit and slides his hand to pull Harry's arm away. Harry follows the movement, his hand joining the other one clutching at the desk desperately. But Louis can feel the way the boy is holding his breath still. He's clearly trying to keep himself quiet, and that needs to change.

Louis raises Harry’s torso slightly as he bends down towards him. They’re pressed together now, Louis’ chest pressing against Harry back. He tucks a strand of Harry's wild hair behind his ear and gets his mouth closer.

"Such a good boy for me." Louis starts. He feels Harry’s jaw set tight against his cheek. "Taking me so well. Feel so good." 

Harry throws his head back on Louis’ shoulder, and Louis takes the opportunity to devour the long line of his neck. 

"C’mon now." Louis whispers. "Let me hear you, angel."

'Louis." he boy finally sobs. 

"There we go.' Louis smiles. 

Harry starts moaning in earnest then. His hips are beginning to follow Louis’, and then things just line up. Harry completely melts in Louis’ arms and so Louis repeats the movement. With the way Harry whimpers every time, Louis guesses he’s hitting it right.

The thing is that it’s getting harder to ignore how close he is now. Louis feels like he’s on fire, like every drag of his cock against Harry’s walls set sparks deep inside his bones. It feels so right to be holding him like this, Louis never wants to let him go, doesn’t want it to end. But as much as he’d like to just drown here in Harry’s wet heat, he also knows he’s not going to be able to last much longer.

"Are you close, baby?"

"Yes, yes, don’t stop." The boy chants brokenly. "Daddy, I—"

Louis feels the way Harry stiffens against him at his own words, and he’s not going to let that happen. "Beautiful, you’re the best boy." Louis praises as he wraps a hand around Harry’s heavy cock. "Love hearing you like this."

"Oh god, daddy, gonna come."

Louis groans, nose buried in the mess of Harry’s curls. The boy completely stills against him as he spills in Louis’ fist. He clenches around Louis and shouts his name until the end. He throws his body on the desk then, goes boneless against the wood. Louis gives one, two, three thrusts into him before he’s spilling into the condom. He’s coming for what feels like an eternity, and even when he’s back to himself and pulls out, he stills feels like every nerve in his body is on edge. 

They both do nothing but breathe down against each other for a while there. Everything is sweaty and sticky and it should be gross, but Louis would happily spend the whole night like this.

It’s Harry who moves first. He drops down to pull his trousers back on, so Louis hands him some tissues to clean up and backs away to give him some space. He’s got his back to Louis still, even once both are fully cleaned up and clothed.

Louis’ heart isn’t calming down. It isn’t calming down because this feels so, so right. Louis wants everything. He wants to fuck him again, wants to see him discover and embrace everything he likes, wants to learn all there is to know about him and cuddle him to sleep. 

It’s terrifying.

Harry finally turns around to face Louis. They stare at each other with this new openness, and something unknown blossoms in Louis’ chest. 

Harry smiles.

Louis takes a few steps towards the boy. His smile broadens, dimples in full display now and yes, there’s something that’s planting itself in Louis’ heart.

When Louis reaches him, Harry fists his hands in his shirt to get him closer until their lips are pressed together. It’s not the best kiss, if Louis’ honest; there’s too much teeth from the way both of them are grinning like idiots and Louis tastes more of himself than Harry’s mouth, but something about it instantly feels like home. 

"So I know we kind of did everything backwards, but… Do you want to go grab something to eat?" Louis asks.

Harry hasn’t stopped smiling, and it gets brighter and bigger again. On anyone else, it would be too much. But on Harry, it just fits. Everything fits. 

"Please." Harry beams. "I would love to."

Louis grabs his hand.


End file.
